It’s a scary thing to look into your own heart. As the Proverb say, as water reflects the face so does the heart reflects the man. At times I don’t want to look into my own heart. I don’t want to find things I can improve on. I don’t want to see all my weakness. I don’t want to see my shortcomings as a man. I don’t want to see who I am. But when I choose to look in, God always seems to reveal Himself to me.
As I look intently at who I am, the more I see the love of God. As I meditate and ask God to reveal to me my own heart I see the things God has made me into. The absolute truth is, I am nothing without Jesus. The very truth is, I cannot do another second without Him. Jesus…He can handle all my shortcomings and all my shame and all my weakness and all my hopelessness and all my anger and all my failures. He takes all the bad and good I am and make me new. He gives me a new heart. Not of stone but of flesh. He handled all my sins and tossed it in the bottom of the ocean and til this day He continues to work on them. I am a desperate broken man who is stunningly beautiful all at the same time. Not because of anything I’ve done but because He has made me into something new.
His love is fierce. His love is not contained but free. It cannot be controlled. It’s raw and it’s powerful. And it consumes me. I get overwhelmed as I focus on His love. I cannot help but to tear up because of how good He is to me. Even when I am not good He is still good to me. I don’t understand it. I can’t wrap my mind around it. But I will choose to live in this love, in His love.
Daily I’m reminded that there is not a thing I can do to make Him love me any less or anything I can do to make Him love me anymore. His love is constant and it’s deeper than the bottomless ocean. He calls me son. Why? I do not know. I was never worthy of His love but He still lavishes it on me.
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5
I am weak and I can do nothing. But Jesus chose me and chose to live in me. So I am made strong. In my weakness I am made strong. I am strong because I am His son. I am strong because my Abba Father has made me strong. I am strong because THE I AM lives in me.
From Him life flows.
With Love…
Brian
